Bipolars moving too quickly in relationships

 

If you're Bipolar I have some questions for you...

1. Do you idealize your new date as if they are perfect?
2. Do you think of the new person in your life as the person you're going to spend the rest of your life with? (Planning out the future in your head before actually going on a first real date with them?)
3. Are you constantly texting/calling this new person?
4. Have you had sex before the third date?
5. Have you talked to them about the future already? Like moving in together, marriage, and kids? And it's only the first month..
6. Have you started obsessing over them and it's only month one?

If you've said yes to any or all of these, you probably move too fast in relationships. It's okay. I do too. I'm guilty of all of these and I have friends who are as well. They are also Bipolar.

I tried looking up research on this topic, Bipolars moving too quickly in relationships. Not much came up. So I'll give my opinions on this one, or at least the reasons on why I think I do it.
 

I told a friend the other day my reasoning. I said the reason I move too fast is because, "I want to make sure there could be a real future with the person and that it could work out before becoming serious with them and actually falling and giving my heart to them." My heart has been broken too many times to count and if having a talk about kids/marriage/politics the first month of talking is too fast for someone than oh well. I'd rather get to know that a person wants the same things as I and has the same ideas as me in the first month, than find out that we have totally opposite views about religion/abortion/children/life a year later.

 

Overly Empathetic

 Think back on this past week. Can you think of more than five times where you were in the same room, same vehicle, same space with someone and their emotions rubbed off on you?

Someone was mad, someone was sad, someone was anxious, someone was happy and you started to feel those emotions as well?

You were being empathetic to them and their emotions. 

This is normal. Everyone, well, most people are somewhat empathetic. But I've started to realize that many of us who are Bipolar are more prone to it, we are almost hyper-empathetic. 

The last couple of weeks I've been away from home and staying at my sister's house. I've noticed my emotions changing more often now because of those I am around. I've learned that those who I am closest with rub off on me more than strangers. My niece, who is also my best friends with, rubs off on me more than anyone. I don't know if it's because I care about her so much or that it's my way of trying to be a best friend/aunt/sister to try to take her emotions away from her and take them on my self even though that really isn't what is happening. Or just that her and I are so close that her emotions just rub off on me. Her girlfriend is Bipolar as well and observing them I've noticed that my my niece's emotions also rub off on her girlfriend very much so as well. 

I've learned to notice when this is happening a lot of the time and to make myself leave the room or put myself in a different head space to cool down if I'm getting angry/stressed/anxious. 

This is also why many of us who are Bipolar can't be friends with those who suffer from Bipolar, the depressive side. We will just be brought down. I think it's a bit of a reason why we tend to hide away when we are in a depressive state too, almost like a shield for others not to get taken down with us. 

I think that being empathetic is a good characteristic to have as a human. It makes us a good friend, and it helps with a lot of jobs. BUT it can be extremely rough to deal with on our souls on a day to day level.